Link: https://www.nytimes.com/2024/02/21/style/louise-blouin-hamptons-bankruptcy-art-society.html
Two specific examples of successfully engaging writing:
- “It was the marquee apartment in a gleaming new residential building designed by the architect Richard Meier. A Damien Hirst painting was hung on a wall; a Tony Cragg sculpture was a living room centerpiece.”
- Words such as “marquee” and “gleaming” combined with the references to gargantuan artists such as Damien Hirst and Tony Cragg do a fantastic job of establishing the lavishness of this space and paint an image of undeniable grandeur.
- “The desk in an upstairs office was spotless and brown. Some of the books on the shelves seemed to have biographical significance. One was Mr. Meier’s “Art and Architecture.” Another was a cautionary tale: “How the Mighty Fall: And Why Some Companies Never Give In,” by Jim Collins.”
- Great attention to detail, and none of them are superfluous. The author was able to extract a metaphor from reality— something that makes their point all the more powerful.
Two specific examples of what doesn’t work so well about the article.
- “When a romance blossomed between Ms. Blouin and Mr. de Pury, they became the talk of the beach and the art world.”
- I feel as though the second half of the sentence is rather weak. While talking about the failure of two marriages— particularly between two incredibly wealthy and distinguished individuals— one would expect the tone of this sentence specifically to reflect more glamor and intrigue. However, the sentence is instead rather brief and plain. I would have expected the sentence to have more of a dramatic effect, as it is such a pivotal point in the article.
- Ex: “When a romance blossomed between Mr. Blouin and Mr. de Pury, they quickly became a societal spectacle— whisperings of their illicit affair made their way through the grapevines of exclusive Hamptons beaches and art world circles.”
- I feel as though the second half of the sentence is rather weak. While talking about the failure of two marriages— particularly between two incredibly wealthy and distinguished individuals— one would expect the tone of this sentence specifically to reflect more glamor and intrigue. However, the sentence is instead rather brief and plain. I would have expected the sentence to have more of a dramatic effect, as it is such a pivotal point in the article.
- “Still, Ms. Blouin seemed in good spirits in the summer of 2022, when she hosted a candlelit dinner party on the deck of La Dune.”
- This functions as a standalone sentence. I am not quite sure it packs enough punch to justify it’s own paragraph.
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